Moments D464: Cleansing Rains

Today started early for me as I had a few things I needed to go over before my final exam.  Time this morning flew by and before I knew it, I was up to my eyes in planning at work.  The day seemed to skip by and though it was an easier day at work, the day still carried a dark cloud.  This afternoon I had to share some concerning news with a co-worker of mine.  It was overdue.  Now in the loop, he too is ready to tackle any oddities that might come down the pipe.  

The late afternoon brightened with a call from a friend who had received some great news from a waiting room.  It was the best kind of news one can get coming from a waiting room.  Our conversation brought a quick smile to my face and the energy to plough through the rest of my tired day with a warmth in my heart.

And yet, underneath the warm fuzzies I was nervous.  I always get nervous before an exam.  No matter how much prep I do, I get nervous.  And though Chica noted that I "...was holding it all together damn well...", underneath I was nervous.

Today's moment was beautiful!  I decided en route to my exam that I would take some time to breathe before my exam.  As I walked out of the parking garage and towards my classroom  I saw it - a present from the universe.  I held my breath.  There was my moment calling to me.  It was a bistro table with one chair overlooking the Ryerson pond.  I walked directly to it and sat down.  For the first five minutes I simply sat there and watched people come and go.  I smelled a wafting cloud of sweet smoke.  And then it began to sprinkle.  I sat there and pulled out my carefully typed up notes for one last round of reading.

As I sat there, a dog played in the water and the pigeons pecked at my feet.  My glasses were speckled with rain and my arms grew chilled.  I inhaled every moment of it, calming and preparing for the next two hours of writing out definitions and essays.

Before I knew it, my final came and went.  As usual, I over thought it.  The questions were challenging, but fair.  I'm sure I did well enough in the end.

As I left the building post-exam, I walked into the pouring rain.  I paused before heading to the parking garage and let the rains wash over me.  What perfect timing to be caught in a downpour. Another beautiful calm moment found despite the stress.  Another class down despite the distractions.

Moments to take pause to centre oneself.

Moments appreciating the pathetic fallacy of much needed cleansing rains.

Moments D463: Goggled Cyclist

This morning on my way to work I saw the most amusing sight.  It was, by far, the highlight of my day in that it offered me an unexpected giggle that lasted a few blocks of my commute.

Before I describe this scene, please keep in mind that it was about 18 degrees out.  Cool for a mid-summer's day, but still balmy and getting warmer as the sun began to share its morning warmth.

The gentleman was older - I would guess late 50's into his 60's.  He was wearing blue shorts (shorter than they should have been too!) and on his torso he wore a long sleeved wind-breaker looking coat. Now, I wouldn't have thought anything of it until I saw the rest of his outfit.  The rest of his outfit, well, it struck me and I had to take a second glance.  Now, the coat looked a lot more like a light ski jacket.  Who wears a ski jacket in the middle of summer, even if it is a wee bit cooler out than normal?

Why did I have a double-take?  This gentleman had a pair of ski goggles on with a toque!!   Big, bold and orange lenses just below a big blue toque.

So toque, goggles, a ski jacket and shorts on the bike.

Very amusing.  I giggled for at least two blocks as I passed him.

Thank you mister Goggled Cyclist for making me smile first thing this morning.

Moments of surprise.

Moments of silliness.

Moments D462: The Card Arrives

This morning I awoke to an email from Heini.  She had emailed to say thanks for the unexpected card she received in the mail!

Job done.  I made my dearest friend smile with a surprise card.  That's a great moment in an otherwise challenging day.

Moments taken to remind your friends that they are important to you.

Moments sharing the light out only to have it reflected back to you.

Moments D461: Squeeze in that workout!

I've been lazy.  It's partially due to the fact that I have two very bruised ankles.  It's partially due to the fact that I've been trying to cram in consulting time for a startup and also catching up with school work.  And it's partially because I haven't been getting to bed on time.  There have simply been too many things to cram into a day and my workouts were trimmed from the schedule.  (On the bright side my ankles are getting better, even though my right still hurts quite a bit!)

Today, as my study break, I decided I was going to squeeze in a workout.  In the end, it was a 90 minute workout.  Surprisingly it wasn't nearly as challenging as I was prepared for after being out of the game (so to speak) for nearly two weeks.  Don't get me wrong.  I struggled.  I cursed.  And I pushed through it with my heavier weights.  I dug deep to push through the pain.  But it wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be.

Now my body has a nice buzz and I feel invigorated to cram in a few more ideas into my head before bed. I also know I will sleep like the dead when my head hits the pillow tonight.

So I'm a little stronger, a little smarter and ready for whatever comes tomorrow.

Moments to pause and invest time in your health.

Moments feeling strong.

Moments D460: New online adventures

Although today was a study day for my final exam, I still managed to have a little bit of fun today.  In fact, it was quite a bit of fun.  I had some online adventures today that were new and exciting.

As I was studying I listened to music, as I always do. I've been listening to 8trcks.com as they have some great playlists of piano and strings.  Piano covers of Hurt, Adele, Christina Perri.  And in my musical travels I found some amazing acapella singers as well. I really love acapella singers like Pentatonix and so this afternoon I listen to quite a few different ones there's a smattering of musical travels I had this afternoon.

Peter Hollens & his wife Evynne
Tyler Ward
Chester See

And then a couple of fun covers by Linsdey Stirling.  My Immortal & Halo.

What an incredible day for finding music.  What an incredible day for enjoying technology in general.  As I sit and reflect upon the day's M&M trail of new music, I think back to years ago when I'd buy myself a new CD with each pay cheque I received.  I collected many strange and some wonderful music over the years this way, but it's a lot more intensive and hit and miss.  Now, with a click of a webpage, within moments you know if you like an artist or not.  You can listen to that artist's favourite artists and so on.  What a wondrous time to be living in.

Technology for finding music, for staying in touch with friends and loved ones.  It's all very amazing.

Moments trying to focus on the task at hand.

Moments distracted by fantastic music and reaching out to friends.

Moments D459: Nerves and pushing through

Before today I've played golf, on a golf course, exactly twice.

Today, I took the day off of work and joined three of my baseball buddies to go golfing.  They all golf.  One actually went to school to become a golf course designer.  Golf is his passion.  Another golfs frequently and will be doing much more of that next year as he has decided to shed a baseball team to make more time for his golf.  The third, he's out golfing often in the summer.  And then there was me - this was to be my third time on a golf course.

As we made our way to the golf course (together in one vehicle) the two avid golfers discussed golf.  I was nervous as I drove to meet them for our carpool.  This did nothing for my comfort level!  Now I was even more nervous.  I spoke up, explaining that this was my third time playing a game, that sure, I'd been mini-golfing (NOT the same) a zillion times and to a driving range a few times, but this would be the third time playing on a course.  I asked the course designer to feel free to share some tips and tricks with me as I'd likely need them and I promised them that I would do my very best not to be an anchor to the team.

But underneath, I was a bundle of nerves.  I didn't want to be an anchor to the team.  Playing best ball, it wasn't likely to happen anyway, I knew this, but I'm not very good at not being good at something and this crew won the tournament last year.  I feared I would be a distraction to their game.  I was quieter than my normal self as I tried to quell my nerves so that I could, at the very least, just enjoy the day away from the office and have some fun without putting too much pressure upon myself.

But, I am who I am.  I like to do well.  I like to be a contributing member of whatever team I'm on.  I am not typically that person that needs to be pulled along.  I was a fish-out-of-water here.  Nerves.

And then, the moment I was most nervous about arrived.  Tee time.  The first drive.  The fist time I'd be swinging a club since last fall.   Top that off with the fact that my foursome asked me to go first.  WOW.  Talk about nerves.

I took my time walking up to my tee.  I breathed deeply as I placed my ball upon its tee.  Stepping back from the tee, I took a few practice swings and tried to remember all the little points to a good swing.  I visualized connecting with the ball and I reminded myself to breathe.     And then, I stepped up to the little white ball on the bright red tee, I breathed in deeply and as I exhaled I began my swing.

I connected with the ball well enough and my ball ended up nearly smack dab middle on the fairway!  Phew.  What a relief that was.  Perhaps I wasn't going to be a total distraction after all!  In the end, we ended up using my drive for the best ball on hole one.  That was a good boost in confidence.

As the remaining holes came and went, I had my ups and downs in my golf game.  I learned tips.  I learned that I didn't like to clip the ground and make a divot and how that messed up my swing.  (apparently golfing is about clipping the ground!)  I learned that over-thinking my swing didn't do me any favours.  I learned how to do a proper pitch (and managed to do two really well!  Better than the boys even!)  I learned a lot about clubs and when to use them.  And, I learned that even those who play the game with a lot more experience make stupid silly mistakes.  That this sport is all about perfecting a skill that is not easy to perfect.  There are so many subtleties that can go wrong.  (e.g. a slight twist of the club (open or closed) has serious consequences to how the ball is hit.)  It is definitely a game of skill, concentration and patience.

In the end, it was almost meditative to me.  I enjoyed being outside in the beautiful sunny summer day.  I enjoyed pausing and breathing and ensuring that my body was aligned just so, so I could hit the ball just so.   I  liked being overly self-aware of how I was swinging and understanding how fast the greens were or countering the winds.

It was an incredible day.  One filled with nervous energy.  A day of learning, laughing and growing.

Moments pushing beyond one's comfort zone.

Moments learning and growing.

Moments D458: Negatives into Positives

The last 48 hours have proven to be strange.  A collision of ideas, energies, and emotions.  A cacophony. For someone as sensitive as I am, that can be overwhelming.   A moment where you want to cover your ears and hide from the world.  And yet, for the first time in a long, long time, I stood strong, I was grounded, and I was unshakeable.  At the end of the day, it was a lot of energy to process and not all of it was easy to shed.

But very early this morning, that's exactly what EQ and I did. With words, love and light, we walked through fears, insecurities, anger, and the haunting pains of past lives.  We transformed the cacophony into a beautiful symphony.  It felt surreal and yet it was most certainly real.  By the end of our conversation, the swirl of negative energy had morphed into a positive expression of a life evolving.  A learning opportunity (or two) to bonding us and allowing us to stretch beyond.

Breathtaking.

Inspiring.

I think I love this process of transforming negative energy into positive energy.  I couldn't have done it alone.

Moments walking through the negative to find and celebrate the positive.

Moments realizing you are stronger and capable than you were a month ago.

Moments D457: Sunshine

Today was cool for a summer day, only 20 degrees, but the sky was a brilliant blue with barely a cloud to punctuate it.  Honestly, a gorgeous day.  A perfect day for me.  Not too hot, not windy with a brilliantly bright sky to get lost in.  And so, given the unease that the day presented to me, I took sometime to enjoy the day. My ND would be proud of me!

As I walked I spoke with a friend.  It was quickly apparent that walking in the shade was chilly, and I sought out a spot that was in full sun.  As we spoke I soaked in the sun, warm on my neck.  As we searched for answers and ideas, the healing rays of the sun found me.  There were moments in our conversation where I drifted, enamoured with the energy filling me.

It was a delightful, simple moment.

It was exactly what I needed.

Moments soaking in ideas.

Moments soaking in the sun.

Moments D456: Bruises

Today I did some research on how to deal with major bruises.  Why?  Well, that's because I managed to bruise not one, but BOTH my ankles in the baseball tournament this past weekend.  (They really aren't pretty!  Here's a picture of them today, 4 days later!)

My right ankle is most certainly a "flesh wound" as I know the softball hit smack on my calf muscle. Unfortunately for my left ankle, it's not so simple.  I took a hard bouncing grounder directly off my ankle joint/bone.  I swear I felt my ankle shift when it hit.  When it first happened, my ankle went numb and I couldn't put much pressure on it.  Within a few minutes I was back up and playing the rest of the game.  (And no, I didn't quite make the play out at first, though I did stop the ball and they didn't take 2nd base!)

Now, I'm pretty sure that I simply have severe bruising. My BFF and EQ don't necessarily have the same confidence that I do about it.  On top of their concerns, I'm thinking about the Tough Mudder event that I'm training for come the end of September in the back of my mind.  I certainly want to make sure that my ankles are going to be okay to train on and push hard come September.  And so, with the gentle pushing from my BFF and EQ, I headed to see a doctor tonight about my left ankle which took the worst blow.  The doctor agreed with my BFF & EQ:  I need an x-ray on my left ankle.  Stay tuned!  My x-ray is first thing tomorrow morning!

In the meantime I did a little digging on how to help huge bruises cycle through quickly.  I found this website that was definitely helpful on how to get rid of bruises.  (And yes, I had a good giggle about using a leech, after all, I have a bucket full of leeches beneath my sink for just such an occasion!)  So far, I've been doing what I can to help the bruises break up and dissipate.  I even had my ankles in the sun today at lunch as I had a quick chat with EQ.

Interestingly, I was told today by Hawk that maybe it was a bruised bone, not a fracture.  She, unlike BFF & EQ thought I was jumping the gun on an x-ray.   Later, I was told by EQ that bones can't bruise. As someone who has managed to avoid serious injury most of her life, I really didn't know one way or the other. Confused and ready to find out I did a little digging on the subject.  The short of it, you really can bruise your bones.  

Basically a bone is bruised from a forceful impact (sports, accident or direct hit) that isn't strong enough to break or fracture the bone.  Treatment:  rest, support, and protect the injured bone and apply conventional treatments for trauma.

So, today, I learned something new.  How to deal with large bruises and that you really can bruise your bones.

Moments considering your options.

Moments realizing it's better to get answers instead of guesses.  

Moments D455: Road Trips

Okay, okay.  I admit, it wasn't really a road trip.  What it was, was an hour and twenty minutes in rush hour traffic, but, hey, it had the atmosphere of a road trip.  We bonded like it was a road trip, can't I pretend that it was a road trip?

This evening after work a colleague of mine and I headed North out of the city to do a corporate photo shoot of portraits for the start-up company I've been consulting with.  With ten people attending, it was important that Chica and I showed up on time and ready for the photo shoot.  And so we left work on time, which, coincidentally was just in time to hit rush hour traffic.

A trip that should take about 30 minutes took us 80 minutes.  Insane, I know.  People do this commute every day.  I don't know how they keep their sanity.  Me, I like rolling out of bed knowing I'm only 20 minutes away, worst case, in rush hour.  But I digress.

Chica and I explored some big life questions and philosophies while we were stuck on the parkway.  Though we weren't driving very fast (real road trips mean covering serious countryside by my definition!), it was very reminiscent of a road trip for me.  Initially we had the tunes rocking out, but the conversation turned serious and deep, so the tunes were turned down so we could focus on the words being shared.  It's these types of moments I love best.  Don't get me wrong, I love to sing at the top of my lungs to my favourite songs on a road trip, but it's the meandering conversations that are my first love of road trips.

During our time together I realized that this lovely woman had more depth I was aware.  I love being surprised!  (though thinking upon it now I shouldn't have been surprised!).  I've known Chica for over a year now and I respect her more than most.  With an amazing zeal for life and her ability to live large, she really is a breath of fresh air when she arrives at work.  She's inspiring, she's full of energy, she's full of ideas and compliments and giggles.  I respected and enjoyed her as the glorious light filled person she is before our "road trip".  And then I spent over two hours (in two car rides) with her talking about life.

Why more incredible?  There is depth.  There is a mature understanding that comes with pains that have been processed giving her a more intelligent perspective on life.  It's not all high energy and fun.  There is real depth to her.  The discussions were intense at times and silly at others.  Very much road trip quality!

I love when you start to see someone in a new light.  It almost always happens (for me) after a deep conversation about life. For me, one of two things occurs - they either shine more beautifully, or their shininess is dulled.   Tonight, I came to respect and appreciate Chica a little more after our mini-road trip.   She is shining much, much more beautifully to me.  I am grateful for our paths to have crossed.

Moments filling time in rush hour.

Moments digging deeper with co-workers to find out they are a whole lot deeper than you were aware.

Moment D454: Trust

Today as I ran my errands I drove past a Christian advertising his religious knowledge on the sidewalk. He was sitting on a lawn chair on the edge of the sidewalk with a big umbrella for shade and a fair size sign sitting on his lap.

The sign was simple:

Repent

Trust

In Jesus

Interestingly each of the "Ts" were made into crosses.  He sat there quietly, slowly turning his umbrella.   It was an odd sight to see considering I've never seen this gentleman before on my very common ride home from the grocery store.  Why today? What was his purpose? Did he really believe that this would work to convert souls?

It had me thinking about why someone would spend the afternoon sitting in a lawn chair with this sign.   Is that a productive way to share this information?   Really?   Score one for me. 

On the flip side,  it also inspired thoughts about trust and what trust was to me.  Score one for the sign bearing Christian.

After arriving home and settling in for the afternoon,  I found myself writing and exploring the concept of trust.  Dang.   Score two for the sign bearing Christian.

Guess sitting on a side walk with a sign can actually inspire people. Go figure!

Moments questioning others actions.

Moment questioning your own.

Moments D453: Gun Show

Today was our baseball tournament.  While it was fun, we lost and I was injured, twice.  (I now have two ankles that are bruised and swollen.  Ah, well.  It serves me right for not catching the ball in the first place, right?)

The team went for lunch after our first two games at our local watering hole and today's moment was when we all sat down at the outdoor table.  My coach looked at me and said, "Show me the gun show."  I looked at him quizzically and then looked at a couple of my team mates to see what the heck he was talking about.  One of the gents started laughing and explained that earlier in the day he had asked our coach if he was "...ready for the gun show..."  at which point he had showed our coach his "guns" (which is showing off your flexed biceps).

Interestingly, our coach had no idea what that had meant...so this was a fun new experience for him. Coach's reply:  those aren't guns...I'll show you guns!

And circle back to all of us sitting at the lunch table and Coach asking me to show him the gun show.  Apparently Coach felt I had better guns than my team mate's guns.  Well, after that story, how could I not oblige?    And so, I showed off my biceps to the table of baseball team mates. We all had a good chuckle.  (And yes, my guns were more defined than my team mates!)

Moments being put in the spotlight.
Moments laughing with your team.

Moments D452: Synchronicity Returns

Last night I headed out for drinks with a sales rep come friend from work.   And, while it was great to catch up and plan, it was the first time I left my car at work instead of driving home.  That meant - no car this morning and using the TTC to get to work for the first time since moving to this apartment.  (Now that I think about it, it's crazy that I haven't taken the transit to work in the 1.5 years I've been living here, but I haven't really had a reason to.)

And so, this morning as I was walking up to the streetcar stop, I realized I was going to miss the streetcar by about 5 minutes.  (It was too hot to run to it and I wasn't in a rush.)  As I stood waiting for the next streetcar (about 24 minutes out according to my app on my phone), I enjoyed a book that was recently gifted to me via Audible.  I've never "read" a book in this manner before and I rather enjoy it and it was a great way to pass the time waiting.

When the street car arrived, I worked out my travel plans in my head, knowing that I'd need to transfer at some point to head South instead of just West.  As we turned our first corner the driver announced that the typical route was detoured and now it was going to pass right by my work.

Huh.

No need to pay attention to where I was on its route anymore.   No need to transfer.

An easy ride into work today after all.  Yes, I think the planets are aligned for me at the moment.

Here's hoping the coming weekend is as filled with puzzle pieces snapping into place!

Unexpected moments.

Moments where things shift, just so, to make your life a touch easier.

Moments D451: Hello Summer!

It's official.  SUMMER IS HERE!  Day three of scorching heat and humidity.  The air conditioners can barely keep up.  I'm not complaining.  SUMMER IS HERE!

I may have mention a moon or two ago, but I really love the seasons.  I love the crispness of autumn and watching the leaves turn.  I love the chill of winter and crunching through a fresh snowfall (never mind the full snowball fights!), I love the clean, reviving smell of spring and watching everything slowly come back to life again and, I love the hot hot heat of summer.  The sticky humidity, the violent thunderstorms, the wall of heat that feels challenging to walk through let alone do anything else in.  The kind of heat that leaves you thirsting for a cold shower.

Today was that day.  At 9 am this morning it was 31 degrees and it felt like 38.  By noon it was 34 degrees and feeling like 43 degrees with the humidity.  IT WAS HOT.  Like walking through soup as one of my co-workers described it.

Today a day of synchronicities, shared stories, surprises, and drinks in a hot bar.  It was the epitome of a perfect summer day!

Moments enjoying the heat.

Moments celebrating summer.

Moments D450: Marry Me

Today there was a lot of talk about weddings, for a fellow team member is about to take the plunge with the love of his life this coming Saturday.  He's a flutter with energy.  He's eager to ensure that everything is well laid out for us before he leaves on his vacation.  It's all very adorable to participate in.

Today I learned how he asked his fiance to marry him.  The funniest part, he swore at her while proposing.  She was too impatient to wait for the words and she said yes before he asked.   Frustrated, excited and surely overflowing with adrenaline and love, he said, "F#ck, let me say the words, I need to say the words."  My oh my, how times have changed.  We all laughed and soaked in the story.

And then, I shared with them this video proposal.  I've watched it a few of times now.  Each and every time, I've cried.  This is not just tearing up.  This is full on emotional  release.  It's so touching.  So thoughtful.  And you can see how much the recipient of the proposal is taking it.  It is, simply, beautiful.

And it happened yet again.  My creative director and I were blubbery fools after watching it this beautiful proposal.

My moment today, appreciating the depth of love a complete stranger has for his partner.

It was also the moment I appreciated the love of a fellow team member for his soon-to-be-wife.

p.s.  We also watched this proposal.  Amusing?  You decide.

Moments D449: SURPRISE!

Today was a day that showered me with surprises.  Some of my surprises weren't fun (like finding out that every street on my commute to work is now under construction - my commute doubled this morning!), but for the most part, it was a day of fun, unexpected moments.  Hawk sent me a heart warming text first thing this morning (that ended up being my alarm), I was able to make an important call this morning that I thought I would have to skip (due to meeting which was pushed back), my BFF dropping by for an unexpected lunch, and an incredibly special and thoughtful video created just for me.

It was a lot to absorb.  But I loved every minute of it.

But the best surprise was an email from my Dad.  He doesn't often email me directly.  He likes to forward silly emails, or emails talking about family, or organizing things, but not very often do I get an email that is specifically for me. Today, the email, while a forward, was specific to me.  His words were simple in their message, but even without many words, it spoke volumes.  The thought behind it, the depth behind it makes my heart smile.  It was, by far, the best surprise of the day.

Moments of surprises.

Moments loving your family that much more.

Moments D448: Patience and Trust and Believing, OH MY!

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you knew there was more to the story being shared but the details weren't being share?   Where the silence is deafening and the pauses between words spoken are screaming at you?  

This very thing has bean happening to me more often recently.  I don't recall it happening near as often before in my life. Does it mean that I'm more intuitive or that I'm simply paying more attention to those around me?  The reason I can't explain, but there is no denying that these gaps exist. These days my intuition is strong and it has been bang on (for better or worse!).   The fact that my intuition is stronger than it's been in years, is a sign that I am back on the right path.   But I digress from the point of today's moment.

Sometimes those you love succumb to fear (don't we all?), but when they stop trusting (themselves or you) they stop believing that there is someone listening, that someone cares.  For the record, I will always listen.  I will always be there for those I love, no matter how dark, no matter how stormy.  I am not here just for the good times.  I'm here on a soul journey and that includes being present even in the darkest of days.

So, while I've been struggling with the silence from my loved ones, on my own, for awhile now, I've found patience.  I know I can't rush my loved ones.  When they are ready to share, I'll ask questions and dive in to support wherever I can.  

Today's moment was when my patience paid off as one of my loved ones opened up about something he's been dealing with on  his own.  The moment itself was a challenge.   The timing of the share, the seriousness of the content and worse yet, the inability to discuss further until much later in the day.  But dive into it later we did.  Now I feel stronger,  empowered with knowledge instead of weak with assumptions.   I feel in tune and in synch with next steps instead of sidelined waiting for words.  I am fully committed to ensuring that my loved one has what he needs to deal with his coming changes.  I know he felt relief after sharing.  As did I. Trust and belief in loved ones:  restored hope.  What an incredible, deep, moment for today.

I have another loved one holding back.  I send her love and light every day, willing her to open up and share.  Patience.  PATIENCE.  I am here when she is ready to trust.  I am here.  MY people, my loved ones matter.... so when they struggle,  I struggle to find solutions. When they celebrate the rain,  I dance and laugh with them.   We need not be alone in this life.

Patience and trust and believing.  

Moments where words matter.   (I suppose that's not fair.  Words always matter!)

Moments where people matter.  (ditto!)

Moments D447: Perfect Presents

Today I had an epiphany!  I figured out the perfect birthday gift for a friend of mine.

Such an awesome feeling!  Now, the question is, will I have time to get it done?

Moments pondering others.

Moments realizing just how well you know your friends.

Moments D446: Familiar Faces Parked Outside

This evening I was running late to get to a friends BBQ.  In a mad dash out of my apartment, my step quickly slowed as I noticed there was someone sitting in the car just outside my home.  I slowed enough to realize that the gentleman in the car was someone I knew.  Someone I would never expect to be in my neighbourhood.  I know this gentleman from work.  He and his wife are fellow foodies, in fact, his wife has a food blog focused on some of her recipes and creations.

What a surprise!  My co-worker jumped from his car looking as shocked as I felt!  He promised that he wasn't stalking me (we had a laugh over that) and explained that his wife's elementary school friend lived, you guessed it, next door to me.  It's crazy how small our world can be sometimes!

My co-worker was surprised that I was living here, as he was unaware of my separation and my relocation.   It's strange to work with someone and them not be aware of a major life shift nearly 2 years ago in the making.  Granted, I only see this co-worker sporadically, but I found it  pretty incredible given the well known information grapevine within my company!  So I gave him a brief run down of my situation.   That in itself was odd.  I haven't shared that story in months now and my co-worker received a very short, watered-down version.

And then I was on my way.

But before I could get into the car I was invited to join my neighbours should I return early enough from my own BBQ.  I never made it back in time, but it felt lovely to be invited.

Moments of surprise.
Moment connecting a little deeper with a co-worker outside work.

Moments D445: Healing Cuteness

Ma-ku, my kitten, is back from the vet and, thankfully doing well.  She's been quite a cutie as she's been healing and today's moment is just a reflection upon those cute moments.

Ma-ku used to like to lay on my chest when she was a wee thing.  As she grew, she understood that she was too big to sleep on my chest any more and the behaviour changed.  She'd be on my lap, or lay partially on my legs, but she wouldn't bother climbing up to my chest and neck area.

Well, since she's been home, that's the only place she wants to be.  In fact, I fell asleep with her late last night (early this morning!) with her on my chest and woke with her in nearly the same position.  Tonight as I tried to eat my dinner in front of the TV, she tried to crawl up again.  I'm sure when I crawl into bed she will follow and lay upon my chest for another night.

She's sore and slow from the medications, but she is happy and purring.  Tomorrow we take a quick trip back to the vet to have her pain medication patch (it works like a nicotine patch) wrapped around her tail.  Hopefully that isn't too traumatic to head back to the vet again so soon.

Moments enjoying that kitty is home again.

Moments being amazed that even animals can be sucky when they aren't feeling well.

Moments D444: Court

Today's moment was a learning opportunity.  Early this year (April actually) I received a traffic violation ticket for not having my license plate sticker renewed for the year.  It was totally my fault.  I received the notification to do so, in February, and then I carefully proceeded to tuck it away somewhere safe until I had to actually update my sticker.

Shockingly, I forgot all about the renewal.

And so, I found myself with a $110 ticket for my forgetfulness.  DAMN!  The police officer that gave me the ticket was very kind and explained that if I purchased my renewal sticker within the week and asked for an early resolution I'd likely have the ticket withdrawn.  And so, my adventures in the legal processes in Ontario began.  I sent in my letter (yes, a good old fashioned letter, in an envelope) to the courthouse downtown.  Two weeks later I received a letter back with my appointment to meet at the courthouse to discuss my early resolution.  It said, the Friday before our big tradeshow.

ACK!

And so, I sent them another letter, requesting a date further out.  Again, I received a letter in return.  Today was my actual court date.  What a strange process so far.  Little did I know what to expect.  I was pleasantly surprised in the end.

I arrived early.  Good thing.  There were (cute!) police officers at the door screening all who entered.  My purse taken, I walked through the metal detector.  Who knew that traffic violations were so serious!  (I am joking, I realize that not all of us in the waiting room were there for traffic violations, but I was surprised to see such security!)

Seated, I waited for the next set of instructions and before long the prosecutor's assistant (a man with a fabulous head of hair and warm demeanour) started collecting our paperwork.  (He reminded me of the "Big Lebowski")  He then called us into his tiny room in groups of three.  The speed at which he reduced fines and violations was incredible.  I was impressed.  I was in and out of that part of the process in maybe 3 minutes.  MAYBE.

While my paperwork was in order and the traffic violation was withdrawn, I still had to go into the courtroom to have it officially dismissed.  What a strange process!  Being new to it all, I was actually enjoying being an observer.  And boy, there was much to observe in the courtroom.

The room was very official, though quite scaled down.  There was a seating area for approximately 20 people.  At the front of the room was the judge, two legal, very official looking assistants.  I would presume that one was the court recorder, while the other announced the violations and accepted the pleas.  Of course, the prosecutor was in front of the table, facing the assistants and the judge along with the rest of us in the "peanut gallery".

It was all very official.  Each and every one of the violations had a script followed.  The person in violation was called to the front and they had to announce his or her name into a microphone.  The judge addressed them, the assistant read out the violation and requested a plea.  The judge was also very scripted.  "Do you render this plea of your own free will?  Are you aware that by doing so you give up your right for a trial.  A plea of guilty comes with a penalty.  The penalty is a fine.  Do you accept these terms?"  Then the prosecutor would announce what that fine she was asking for this reduced violation.  In a few instances, the judge further decreased the fine for those that seemed to be in need of it.  (a single mom, a struggling immigrant) But the judge also pushed back with another who tried to ride the gravy train of compassion.   It was all so very, VERY interesting.  I think I could have sat there all day just observing and absorbing.

When it was my turn it was rather anti-climatic.  I stated my name and the prosecutor announced that my paperwork was in order and the violation was withdrawn.  Just as quickly as I arrived to the front, the judge had set me on my way with quick "have a good day."

And that was that.  For $7.50 in parking and an hour of my time I spared myself a $110 ticket fine.  And, by watching the rest of the process, it seems it is fairly easy to get a reduced fine for speeding.  All very interesting.

A moment of learning and observing.

A moment watching an age old tradition in the works.

Moments D443: Steaming open an envelope

This evening I wrote out a couple of cards for people nearest and dearest to me.  Why?  Why not is really the question - why not!?

Hand writing cards have become a lost art, in our digital era and yet, who doesn't smile when they get a note in their mail?   Writing out cards for those I love is something I really love to do.  Words of encouragement.  Words of love.  Words reminding my favourite peeps to love themselves a lot more and to be less hard on themselves.   And, I love the element of surprise.  They are unknowing and I never know when it will actually be delivered.

Today, when I sealed one of my cards in its envelope, I realized that you could read what I wrote on the back of it through the envelope.  Tacky.  I don't want the world to read my words meant for the eyes of someone I love!  And so, I found myself trying to re-open the envelope without damaging it.

Of course, this particular envelope's glue was holding fast!  I decided to try an age old trick - steam the envelope open.  I've never done this before.  I wasn't even sure if it would work, but I had to try it before I cut it open.

And low and behold - IT WORKED!  Happy dance, happy dance!

I fixed my card up so that it couldn't be read by anyone handling the envelope and then I taped it shut again.

So my moment today, a silly one, but one where I realized that ya, steaming open an envelope works as advertised!

Moments trying an old trick and it working.

Moments sharing words.

Moments D442: Fence Art

Today I took my baby Ma-Ku in to be spayed and declawed. I  know she's in good hands and she's recuperating already! (Yes - go ahead and judge me.  I still can't understand how removing an animals ability to breed is humane and yet declawing them isn't.  Any surgery to modify your pet is "unnatural" and "against its natural being".  You think cats were meant to be lounging around uninterested in reproducing?  Nope....but, I digress!)

After I dropped her off, I noticed something quite incredible on my walk back to the car.  Fence art.  All along the wrought iron fence defining the local park was a most peculiar sight.  It was a flotsam and jetsam of long forgotten knitted items.  Abandoned sweaters, rugs and scarves were all neatly pulled apart, twisted, weaved and placed onto the fence.

What a delightful surprise.  I stood on the sidewalk for quite a few moments just soaking it in!  And then I took some pictures.  (You'll see them below!)  What a wonderful way to start my day!

Moments being surprised.
Moments enjoying new art.

Moments D441: It's Pouring, it's pouring....

According to my weather station we had 100+mm of rain fell between 4:45 pm and 6 pm.  That's a LOT of rain.  Typically in the month of July we see an average of 74 mm or so.  That's a WHOLE month of rain!  The one-day record rainfall of  29.2 mm was blown out of the water by today's storm.  Incredible.
(read more here and see some photos here and a cool video here)

Not only did I enjoy watching today's storm hit, I had fun splashing in the puddles on my way to the car after work.  But the best moment of this storm was when I was all cozy eating dinner and I get a near panicked text from my aunt.

"Hey, what the hell is going on there?  You okay?"

"Um.  Ya.  I'm okay.  Why wouldn't I be?"

And then she filled me in.  Oh my.  I had no idea.  What a crazy deluge!  Incredible.  Powerful.  It will be curious to see what the next couple of days bring to clean it all up.  I'm sure many  homes were flooded in the lower areas of the city (likely my old home too come to think of it).  While I'm grateful to be on the 2nd floor, my heart goes out to those dealing with flooded homes.  I've been there, done that.  It's not fun.

In all the years I've lived in Southern Ontario, I've never heard of such a storm or such widespread flooding. Mother Earth....are you angry with us?

Moments enjoying a rain storm.
Moments realizing that the storm turned the city inside out.

Moments D440: Pouring Rain and a Nap

Today's moment is a simple one.  A simple day of getting caught up, slowly, methodically.

Laundry, housework, homework.  A productive day.  It helped that it was cloudy most of the day.  But this late afternoon, the skies opened up.  The world outside was awash in deluge.  The sound was incredible upon my window and as I sat there reading one of my articles for class.  So much so, that I closed my eyes, and focused on the drumming against my window.  I could hear the flood of waters in the eaves troughs.  I could feel the air turn from hot and humid to that with a slight chill.  I even took a wee video of the sounds.

As I lay there enjoying the sounds of the downpour, I had myself a wee nap.  Why not?  It's Sunday afternoon, I'm enjoying nature's percussion.  A mini-cat nap later, and dreams of playing in the rainstorm, I was back reading my articles for class.  I felt rejuvenated and ready for the rest of my evening's work.

Moments to take pause and enjoy the sounds of nature.

Moments dreaming of playing in the rain.

Moments D439: Ever Digging

These past few weeks have been life changing for me.  I have been digging ever deeper into the shadows of my heart and soul.  Years of accumulated pains and neglect found me with very stubborn daemons.  In the past month, I've started to feel them lift from me.  It's a glorious feeling, but the steps along the way are not always easy.

Today's moment is about one of those raw emotional moments.  As painful as it was, it was cathartic.  Twice.  The same subject at two slightly different angles.  Digging deep today meant getting into the nitty-gritty and then going a little deeper.  It meant I had to push through the fear and  shove the embarrassment aside.  I wasn't sure, either time if I'd have the courage.

In these moments, when you do dig as deep as this was, you need to believe that those you share with will stand strong and hold you tight and not judge.

Today, I was fortunate enough to have two of those moments.  The first was happened this afternoon.  I went deep this afternoon.  Very deep.  Coerced a little, but I understood that it was time to look at the reflection in the mirror.  As hail suddenly dropped from the sky and interrupted the intense conversation, I wept as the emotions flooded over me, but my tears were (fortunately!) lost in the moment.  Then the hail turned into gobs of rain and laughter and silliness ensued.  My tears dried and I was, once again, listening in wonder to the depth of support that I had in front of me.

I have been on a soul journey these past two (or so) years.  Digging ever deeper.  Exploring.  Sometimes the reflection in the mirror is not so kind to look at.  But with every step forward, that has begun to change.  To really, deeply change.  Today, I felt it.  Today, I believed it.  That's a first.

The second moment (of this very same nature) came much later in the evening.  I recounted the days events to Heini.   I shared my deepest darkest feelings and before I knew it, she shed tears for me and the journey I had taken over the past 5-7 years.  And then, we celebrated just how far I've come and the promise of hope that was on my doorstep.  No more self-made obstacles.  Life is for living.  Life is for digging ever deeper, because this soul won't have it any other way.

Moments for cathartic sharing.  Worlds lifted from your shoulders.

Moments believing.  Truly believing, in the path ahead.

Moments D438: Hot Hot Heat

Here in the big smoke it's been hot and muggy. Pretty typical for summer in the city, but that's nothing in comparison to a friend of mine who recently found himself stranded in the desert without enough water.   (Seriously.  And he knows better!)

With temperatures over 120 degrees F, the sun hot on his back, it was not a good situation.  My day's moment is not about his dangerous moment, so I won't bore you with the frightening statistics and details.  But, there there are similarities to the shift in energy that EQ experienced and self-awareness that followed, to my own only two days ago.  Know that this life threatening situation was resolved and what followed this hot hot mess, was my inspired moment of the day.

Mentally and physically exhausted from his ordeal, EQ found himself in a euphoric state when he arrived at his hotel for the night.  Having survived the fiery halls of hell (not without blisters and rashes), he found himself riding through a sky full of fourth of July fireworks which were followed by nature's own fireworks:  A thunderstorm in the desert.  As the charged rains finally washed over him, he found himself celebrating.  From the fiery halls of hell to such jubilation:  a ride like none other he's experienced before.

Earlier in the day I was worried for him on his hot hot adventure so I was happy to hear of his adventure from his hotel very early this morning. And as I watched his retelling of the tale, I could nearly see the energy pouring from him.  It was tangible.  He was alight from the self-reflections of the day, the extremes and the significance of many moments throughout his day.  His excitement as he shared his triumphant celebration of exiting the fiery halls of hell, was captivating and inspiring.    Many, MANY miles away from the hot, hot heat of Toronto, I could see, and feel that this was a momentous experience for him.

My moment:  sitting back and enjoying his euphoria.  Always one to revel in another's joy, I find I look for moments where I can partake in the excitement and growth of  friends and family around me.  After all, digging deeper.  Isn't that what it's all about?

This was a moment that I will not soon forget.    Such raw energy.

Moments shared.
Moments that inspire your own cleansing.

Moments D437: Smokey vs Smoky

Today we had a discussion in our department upon the spelling of smokey.  (my preferred!)

Was it "smokey" or was it "smoky"?

We had a mini-spelling bee that included one of the executive team members from another department.  In the end, our senior copywriter seemed to be on his own with the spelling of "smoky", whereas the majority was  more comfortable with the spelling as "smokey".  Go figure.

And so, I had to look it up online and figure out how it was that our authority on copy was disagreeing with the majority.  And I found this website on the English Forums.

The major point from this site:  "use smoky if you don't want to be old-fashioned".

We all had a good giggle. We were all the old-fashioned users of the word and our executive team member said outloud, "sure, you are hip and cool with the ky".  And then she realized what she said.  The room exploded in laughter.

You can't script that kind of humour.  My face and belly hurt from laughing too hard.

Moments trying to better understand the English language.

Moments of explosive laughter.

Moments D436: Reliving Moments

Today was slow start for me.  I had the entire day booked off as a vacation day, but I decided to only take the morning to myself before going into the office this afternoon to, at the very lease, clean up my emails.  I did, however, luxuriate in my lazy morning where I had plenty of time to relive and share a couple of moments.  Contrary to one another, one from my incredible weekend just passed and the other was from my recent past.  I found myself reflecting over all that has happened in the past year, where I've been, where I am, and of course, where I'm going.  This past weekend was life altering; this morning I relived the moments that changed my path.  

After waking lazily (no alarm!) I decided to upload some of my sky diving photos online to share with the world; it was a joy to relive this moment of excitement and joy and honest to goodness euphoria.  Euphoria was quickly dulled as I found myself wrestling with something that has been haunting me for far too long.  Reliving the haunting of my recent past was not a pleasant moment; it became thief to my  excited energy brought to me by my newest adventure.  This haunting was no longer something that could be avoided given my new perspective, given my need for a clear path into my future.  And as I relived the moment with my nearest and dearest I felt a sense of relief wash over me as the solution (not a new solution, but one now unavoidable) presented itself once again.  

With a feeling of wonder for the shifts in energies this morning, I followed the path of relief.  After, as I readied myself for my afternoon of work, I found myself reflecting upon this shift of emotion and the eerie familiarity of it all.  (the high, the low, the high, the low.....)  It was definitely time to clear my path.  

Given this swing of emotion, I found myself feeling dulled.  And then I arrived at work and shared my life-changing weekend adventure with the team.  Before I knew it, my energy had shifted once again back to the this vivacious place I like to live.  Excited stories of my weekend came hurriedly.  The photo sharing,  the laughter; before I knew it, my energy was high and bright again.

And then it hit me.  Sharing milestones with people can be inspiring to others.  The energy in the office was high an the excitement from my posting of photos online was something I've never experienced before.  My bucket list check-mark had become an inspiration to others.  I was awed how sharing can create such energy and inspiration amoung my family and friends.  

Today's moment reliving past moments found me a reflective student.  I'm ready for my future, more than I've ever been.  With a new perspective on how to deal with obstacles and opportunities, I am ready.

Moments reliving other moments.

Moments realizing there has been a shift.

Moments D435: Patience a Virtue

Today was a travel day.  Sure, the morning was calm and relaxed, but we hit the airport mid-afternoon, my flight out wasn't until 9pm and EQ left at 3.  I had a good long time to sit around and wait.  And wait I did as my flight was 30 minute delayed as well.  What a long day.

But as I sat in the airport and watched people come and go, I realized that this too wasn't so bad for me.  Patience is a good thing to dig deep for sometimes and being in a busy airport for four hours without wi-fi was a challenge!  I did some of my school readings, I organized my photos on my laptop and cleaned up old ones from my phone.  At no point in the waiting game did I feel like I was waiting.  I kept myself very busy, and quite productive.  I even met a gentleman who had just finished a Tough Mudder race earlier that weekend.  It made me anxious and excited for my own race this coming September.

I could have been grumpy about my wait times, but what's the point?  Why bring myself down just because of the location I was in.  Had I managed to get home sooner I would have been busy unpacking and doing homework anyway.  In fact, in this case, perhaps it was better that I was in the airport as going through old photos would never have been accomplished at home.  In the airport, it was a priority.  At home; not so much!

Today's moment, being patient without realizing you were being patient.  Six hours flew by.  As did my car ride home getting me in very late (3am).  Funny how perspective on your life and things that matter changes one's ability to dig a little deeper for patience.  Having recently jumped out of a plane, met a handful of interesting, positive and vibrant people, I am further inspired to dig deeper to share my light with those around me.  Six hours?  Who's counting.

Moments finding patience.
Moments realizing it doesn't matter and stuff is getting done.

Moments D434: Chicago, my favourite city in the US

Now I suppose that's not really a fair statement given that I haven't been in a lot of cities in the US.  I've been to most of the big ones though (LA, San Diego, San Francisco, Palm Springs, Dallas, Fort Worth, NYC, a bunch in New York State, Las Vegas, Phoenix, and I'm sure a few I've forgotten about in OH & PA!) and somehow Chicago stole my heart.  As we drove up to the city late last night, I couldn't help but pause our conversation to say "Helloooo Chicago!".

Today's moment was sitting back and really enjoying Navy Pier.  Normally I'd have a plan of at least three major things to cram into the day, but this time around I decided to let go and see where the flow took me.  My typical life/personality doesn't really allow for this type of travelling, for I love to explore all the nooks and crannies of a new local.  The last time I was here though, I saw a lot of the touristy places (and a few not) - it was a crammed trip.  This time around, I was more than content to soak in the navy pier atmosphere.

It was a perfect venue for a stroll (even if I did keep losing the hat on my head to the wind!) and to swap stories and try to solve some world problems.  Sitting at the end of the pier, wind running through our hair, EQ and I watched as the boats come and went for quite some time.  I honestly don't recall for how long as time seemed to still.  The conversation was inspiring and uplifting to my soul.  

On our walk back we stopped to ride the Ferris wheel.  I can't remember the last time I rode on one.  The ride was quick, but I managed to get a few nice pictures of the city from the air.

A pretty city indeed.  It's too bad that I missed out on their famous deep dish pizza (a foodie could die for that pizza!) or even one of their crazy "Chicago" hotdogs.  But I was saving myself for an amazing dinner at  Joe's and I was not disappointed!

Chicago stole my heart a couple of years ago and my love has only been inflamed once again for Chicago is even pretty in the rain and prettier yet when trying to solve the world's problems in a day.

Moments to relax and take your time with a day.

Moments knowing that good conversation is a keystone to the best of friends and life in general.

p.s.  HAPPY CANADA DAY!