If only life were like that. One more episode. One more chance to see you favourite characters again. Oh what many of us would do to have one last episode in life.
Today was a quiet reflection of that idea. Today EQ and I met up with my parents post their recent Disney cruise with my brother and his family. It was so very good to see them and to catch up. There never really seems to be enough time though. The afternoon flew by and before I knew it EQ and I were back on the highway heading home.
During that short 45 minute drive home, I was supposed to be reading my textbook. Instead, blaming the dwindling light of the early evening sky, I suggested that we spend the time talking. Okay, okay. I lied. I didn't suggest anything, I actually insisted that we talk instead of us sitting together in silence for the drive. (Is that bad?) I could see and feel that something was on EQ's mind. The energy was pouring off him.
And so we dove in, as we normally do, and before long we were at the heart of it. Without going into the intimate details, the heart of it was: fear of change. When you think about it, we're all afraid of change on some level. If only we could take some of those fears of change and spin it into a new perspective. That said, today's fears were a little more primal and deep and it wasn't until much later that I realized this.
We had been home, I had done some reading for class and we were about to snuggle in for the rest of the evening when today's moment hit me. It happened just as EQ and I realized we had one more episode of Sons of Anarchy to watch for the season's finale. It was silly, but we had a mini-celebration over the news. Just when we thought we would have to find something else to watch we were instead able to dive into one more storyline with our favourite characters. Woot!
Silly, right? And that's when it hit me. It's a silly comparison, but one that I think many can appreciate. The fear of change is like reaching that last episode. It's the uncertainty of a new chapter (or novel). It's leaving the past behind with only the future ahead. Will the next season be as good? Will you like the characters that remain? Will you grieve the loss of characters from the last season? So much uncertainty. Often, with a good story line, we the audience want one more episode to luxuriate in.
I think we do that in real life too. One more moment. That night that you never want to end. That morning you slap snooze on your alarm clock for just a few more minutes of sleep. Those last moments with a loved leaving to head home to the other side of the country. Those moments telling a loved one that it's okay to let go, that those behind will always remember them.
One more moment. Without really acknowledging it, we have mini-celebrations all the time for finding one more moment.
Today, I acknowledge it aloud: I am going to celebrate the episode(s) that I'm in because I am simply not ready for the last episode. I know it will come, in one area of my life or another. Right now however, I am going to be more present and enjoy and celebrate the episode that I'm in. I know when the change comes (and it will) I know I will be looking for one more episode, one more moment to celebrate. I won't be able to stop that natural wish, but I do know I can celebrate a little sooner and be present today.
Moments connecting strange dots together.
Moments reflecting upon the amazing circle of love and light I find myself enveloped in.
No comments:
Post a Comment