Moments D464: Cleansing Rains

Today started early for me as I had a few things I needed to go over before my final exam.  Time this morning flew by and before I knew it, I was up to my eyes in planning at work.  The day seemed to skip by and though it was an easier day at work, the day still carried a dark cloud.  This afternoon I had to share some concerning news with a co-worker of mine.  It was overdue.  Now in the loop, he too is ready to tackle any oddities that might come down the pipe.  

The late afternoon brightened with a call from a friend who had received some great news from a waiting room.  It was the best kind of news one can get coming from a waiting room.  Our conversation brought a quick smile to my face and the energy to plough through the rest of my tired day with a warmth in my heart.

And yet, underneath the warm fuzzies I was nervous.  I always get nervous before an exam.  No matter how much prep I do, I get nervous.  And though Chica noted that I "...was holding it all together damn well...", underneath I was nervous.

Today's moment was beautiful!  I decided en route to my exam that I would take some time to breathe before my exam.  As I walked out of the parking garage and towards my classroom  I saw it - a present from the universe.  I held my breath.  There was my moment calling to me.  It was a bistro table with one chair overlooking the Ryerson pond.  I walked directly to it and sat down.  For the first five minutes I simply sat there and watched people come and go.  I smelled a wafting cloud of sweet smoke.  And then it began to sprinkle.  I sat there and pulled out my carefully typed up notes for one last round of reading.

As I sat there, a dog played in the water and the pigeons pecked at my feet.  My glasses were speckled with rain and my arms grew chilled.  I inhaled every moment of it, calming and preparing for the next two hours of writing out definitions and essays.

Before I knew it, my final came and went.  As usual, I over thought it.  The questions were challenging, but fair.  I'm sure I did well enough in the end.

As I left the building post-exam, I walked into the pouring rain.  I paused before heading to the parking garage and let the rains wash over me.  What perfect timing to be caught in a downpour. Another beautiful calm moment found despite the stress.  Another class down despite the distractions.

Moments to take pause to centre oneself.

Moments appreciating the pathetic fallacy of much needed cleansing rains.

Moments D463: Goggled Cyclist

This morning on my way to work I saw the most amusing sight.  It was, by far, the highlight of my day in that it offered me an unexpected giggle that lasted a few blocks of my commute.

Before I describe this scene, please keep in mind that it was about 18 degrees out.  Cool for a mid-summer's day, but still balmy and getting warmer as the sun began to share its morning warmth.

The gentleman was older - I would guess late 50's into his 60's.  He was wearing blue shorts (shorter than they should have been too!) and on his torso he wore a long sleeved wind-breaker looking coat. Now, I wouldn't have thought anything of it until I saw the rest of his outfit.  The rest of his outfit, well, it struck me and I had to take a second glance.  Now, the coat looked a lot more like a light ski jacket.  Who wears a ski jacket in the middle of summer, even if it is a wee bit cooler out than normal?

Why did I have a double-take?  This gentleman had a pair of ski goggles on with a toque!!   Big, bold and orange lenses just below a big blue toque.

So toque, goggles, a ski jacket and shorts on the bike.

Very amusing.  I giggled for at least two blocks as I passed him.

Thank you mister Goggled Cyclist for making me smile first thing this morning.

Moments of surprise.

Moments of silliness.

Moments D462: The Card Arrives

This morning I awoke to an email from Heini.  She had emailed to say thanks for the unexpected card she received in the mail!

Job done.  I made my dearest friend smile with a surprise card.  That's a great moment in an otherwise challenging day.

Moments taken to remind your friends that they are important to you.

Moments sharing the light out only to have it reflected back to you.

Moments D461: Squeeze in that workout!

I've been lazy.  It's partially due to the fact that I have two very bruised ankles.  It's partially due to the fact that I've been trying to cram in consulting time for a startup and also catching up with school work.  And it's partially because I haven't been getting to bed on time.  There have simply been too many things to cram into a day and my workouts were trimmed from the schedule.  (On the bright side my ankles are getting better, even though my right still hurts quite a bit!)

Today, as my study break, I decided I was going to squeeze in a workout.  In the end, it was a 90 minute workout.  Surprisingly it wasn't nearly as challenging as I was prepared for after being out of the game (so to speak) for nearly two weeks.  Don't get me wrong.  I struggled.  I cursed.  And I pushed through it with my heavier weights.  I dug deep to push through the pain.  But it wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be.

Now my body has a nice buzz and I feel invigorated to cram in a few more ideas into my head before bed. I also know I will sleep like the dead when my head hits the pillow tonight.

So I'm a little stronger, a little smarter and ready for whatever comes tomorrow.

Moments to pause and invest time in your health.

Moments feeling strong.

Moments D460: New online adventures

Although today was a study day for my final exam, I still managed to have a little bit of fun today.  In fact, it was quite a bit of fun.  I had some online adventures today that were new and exciting.

As I was studying I listened to music, as I always do. I've been listening to 8trcks.com as they have some great playlists of piano and strings.  Piano covers of Hurt, Adele, Christina Perri.  And in my musical travels I found some amazing acapella singers as well. I really love acapella singers like Pentatonix and so this afternoon I listen to quite a few different ones there's a smattering of musical travels I had this afternoon.

Peter Hollens & his wife Evynne
Tyler Ward
Chester See

And then a couple of fun covers by Linsdey Stirling.  My Immortal & Halo.

What an incredible day for finding music.  What an incredible day for enjoying technology in general.  As I sit and reflect upon the day's M&M trail of new music, I think back to years ago when I'd buy myself a new CD with each pay cheque I received.  I collected many strange and some wonderful music over the years this way, but it's a lot more intensive and hit and miss.  Now, with a click of a webpage, within moments you know if you like an artist or not.  You can listen to that artist's favourite artists and so on.  What a wondrous time to be living in.

Technology for finding music, for staying in touch with friends and loved ones.  It's all very amazing.

Moments trying to focus on the task at hand.

Moments distracted by fantastic music and reaching out to friends.

Moments D459: Nerves and pushing through

Before today I've played golf, on a golf course, exactly twice.

Today, I took the day off of work and joined three of my baseball buddies to go golfing.  They all golf.  One actually went to school to become a golf course designer.  Golf is his passion.  Another golfs frequently and will be doing much more of that next year as he has decided to shed a baseball team to make more time for his golf.  The third, he's out golfing often in the summer.  And then there was me - this was to be my third time on a golf course.

As we made our way to the golf course (together in one vehicle) the two avid golfers discussed golf.  I was nervous as I drove to meet them for our carpool.  This did nothing for my comfort level!  Now I was even more nervous.  I spoke up, explaining that this was my third time playing a game, that sure, I'd been mini-golfing (NOT the same) a zillion times and to a driving range a few times, but this would be the third time playing on a course.  I asked the course designer to feel free to share some tips and tricks with me as I'd likely need them and I promised them that I would do my very best not to be an anchor to the team.

But underneath, I was a bundle of nerves.  I didn't want to be an anchor to the team.  Playing best ball, it wasn't likely to happen anyway, I knew this, but I'm not very good at not being good at something and this crew won the tournament last year.  I feared I would be a distraction to their game.  I was quieter than my normal self as I tried to quell my nerves so that I could, at the very least, just enjoy the day away from the office and have some fun without putting too much pressure upon myself.

But, I am who I am.  I like to do well.  I like to be a contributing member of whatever team I'm on.  I am not typically that person that needs to be pulled along.  I was a fish-out-of-water here.  Nerves.

And then, the moment I was most nervous about arrived.  Tee time.  The first drive.  The fist time I'd be swinging a club since last fall.   Top that off with the fact that my foursome asked me to go first.  WOW.  Talk about nerves.

I took my time walking up to my tee.  I breathed deeply as I placed my ball upon its tee.  Stepping back from the tee, I took a few practice swings and tried to remember all the little points to a good swing.  I visualized connecting with the ball and I reminded myself to breathe.     And then, I stepped up to the little white ball on the bright red tee, I breathed in deeply and as I exhaled I began my swing.

I connected with the ball well enough and my ball ended up nearly smack dab middle on the fairway!  Phew.  What a relief that was.  Perhaps I wasn't going to be a total distraction after all!  In the end, we ended up using my drive for the best ball on hole one.  That was a good boost in confidence.

As the remaining holes came and went, I had my ups and downs in my golf game.  I learned tips.  I learned that I didn't like to clip the ground and make a divot and how that messed up my swing.  (apparently golfing is about clipping the ground!)  I learned that over-thinking my swing didn't do me any favours.  I learned how to do a proper pitch (and managed to do two really well!  Better than the boys even!)  I learned a lot about clubs and when to use them.  And, I learned that even those who play the game with a lot more experience make stupid silly mistakes.  That this sport is all about perfecting a skill that is not easy to perfect.  There are so many subtleties that can go wrong.  (e.g. a slight twist of the club (open or closed) has serious consequences to how the ball is hit.)  It is definitely a game of skill, concentration and patience.

In the end, it was almost meditative to me.  I enjoyed being outside in the beautiful sunny summer day.  I enjoyed pausing and breathing and ensuring that my body was aligned just so, so I could hit the ball just so.   I  liked being overly self-aware of how I was swinging and understanding how fast the greens were or countering the winds.

It was an incredible day.  One filled with nervous energy.  A day of learning, laughing and growing.

Moments pushing beyond one's comfort zone.

Moments learning and growing.

Moments D458: Negatives into Positives

The last 48 hours have proven to be strange.  A collision of ideas, energies, and emotions.  A cacophony. For someone as sensitive as I am, that can be overwhelming.   A moment where you want to cover your ears and hide from the world.  And yet, for the first time in a long, long time, I stood strong, I was grounded, and I was unshakeable.  At the end of the day, it was a lot of energy to process and not all of it was easy to shed.

But very early this morning, that's exactly what EQ and I did. With words, love and light, we walked through fears, insecurities, anger, and the haunting pains of past lives.  We transformed the cacophony into a beautiful symphony.  It felt surreal and yet it was most certainly real.  By the end of our conversation, the swirl of negative energy had morphed into a positive expression of a life evolving.  A learning opportunity (or two) to bonding us and allowing us to stretch beyond.

Breathtaking.

Inspiring.

I think I love this process of transforming negative energy into positive energy.  I couldn't have done it alone.

Moments walking through the negative to find and celebrate the positive.

Moments realizing you are stronger and capable than you were a month ago.