A Ted Talk that I watched today that echoes my feeling of not procrastinating. Take hold. Cease the day. Invest in yourself.
http://www.ted.com/talks/meg_jay_why_30_is_not_the_new_20.html
Monday, May 13, 2013
Moments D385: Legacies
Today I was in the hospital from the crack of dawn to sunset. After spending over 12 hours in the hospital, a large portion of that in a waiting room, one has a lot of time to think about, well, pretty much everything.
In the waiting room, there were many families waiting for news about their loved ones. While the first waiting room we waited in as Dad was having his surgery was eerily quiet with hushed tones, the second waiting room for the CVICU was more a-buzz with shared stories amoungst waiting family members.
Some, actually, come to think of it, most of the stories I heard tugged at my heart strings. The gentleman undergoing by-pass surgery for a second time because he couldn’t find the willpower to stop eating fast food, even with his doting daughter cooking for him more often than not. She was heart broken and angry. The wife who was shocked when her husband fell over with his heart attack. She was too stunned to call 911 at first. She shared her terrifying story in great detail with her family around her and for the rest of the waiting room to hear. There were others and each time I silently thanked my father for paying attention to his body. For listening to its cry for help so that he was here for surgery on a preventative measure instead of an urgent necessity.
Listening to these stories and walking through the different wings of the hospital over the course of the day really had me thinking about legacies. Each wing was dedicated (named) in someone’s honour. I didn’t know whoPeter Munk was until just today and that’s only because he has a ward in Toronto General named after him. Now, reading his bio, I realize that his legacy goes well beyond the naming of this wing, but it’s purpose worked - I now know who he is.
Legacies. Interesting fuel for one that has a burning fire within.
It’s hard not to think about what MY legacy will be. I don’t have an outstanding career. I don’t have children. I will not invent something that changes the world, nor will I ever have enough money to inspire a new wing in a hospital or to establish a new arm in a university. So what’s my offering to the world and what do I leave behind?
Good question. It’s a question that crosses my mind from time to time, but not one that I’ve sat with for so long and with such depth as I have today. Today, I found myself digging deeper on the subject.
Here’s what I realized and what I am actually quite happy and comfortable about: I live (at least I really try) each day as a new day. I push myself hard every day. I believe that there is no room in my life for laziness. (And no, I’m not talking about the peaceful calm, quiet of relaxing.) Every day, every moment is a new opportunity to define myself. I may not have a legacy to offer the world, but I know that I do touch lives. I have inspired. I have consoled. I have commiserated. I have laughed and brought laughter. I know that I bring a light to many. Can I call that my legacy? I don’t know. I really don’t. But I do know, that I’m not sitting around feeling sorry for myself that I don’t have a traditional legacy to offer the world. When I’m gone, the world will keep turning and I will be forgotten. That’s okay - what the heck do I care? I’ll be ashes in the wind. What’s more important to me, is being here and now and making a difference when and where I can.
My moment today is recognizing that it’s okay to be average and not have a legacy. Through that discovery process, I realized also that those closest to me would never agree with that statement above. I know that I’ve made a difference in their lives. It may not be worthy of a namesake and my name going down in history, but it means the world to me to know that I’ve made a difference in some peoples lives. However small my contribution is to this world, it matters.
Moments realizing your insignificance.
Moments realizing your importance.
In the waiting room, there were many families waiting for news about their loved ones. While the first waiting room we waited in as Dad was having his surgery was eerily quiet with hushed tones, the second waiting room for the CVICU was more a-buzz with shared stories amoungst waiting family members.
Some, actually, come to think of it, most of the stories I heard tugged at my heart strings. The gentleman undergoing by-pass surgery for a second time because he couldn’t find the willpower to stop eating fast food, even with his doting daughter cooking for him more often than not. She was heart broken and angry. The wife who was shocked when her husband fell over with his heart attack. She was too stunned to call 911 at first. She shared her terrifying story in great detail with her family around her and for the rest of the waiting room to hear. There were others and each time I silently thanked my father for paying attention to his body. For listening to its cry for help so that he was here for surgery on a preventative measure instead of an urgent necessity.
Listening to these stories and walking through the different wings of the hospital over the course of the day really had me thinking about legacies. Each wing was dedicated (named) in someone’s honour. I didn’t know whoPeter Munk was until just today and that’s only because he has a ward in Toronto General named after him. Now, reading his bio, I realize that his legacy goes well beyond the naming of this wing, but it’s purpose worked - I now know who he is.
Legacies. Interesting fuel for one that has a burning fire within.
It’s hard not to think about what MY legacy will be. I don’t have an outstanding career. I don’t have children. I will not invent something that changes the world, nor will I ever have enough money to inspire a new wing in a hospital or to establish a new arm in a university. So what’s my offering to the world and what do I leave behind?
Good question. It’s a question that crosses my mind from time to time, but not one that I’ve sat with for so long and with such depth as I have today. Today, I found myself digging deeper on the subject.
Here’s what I realized and what I am actually quite happy and comfortable about: I live (at least I really try) each day as a new day. I push myself hard every day. I believe that there is no room in my life for laziness. (And no, I’m not talking about the peaceful calm, quiet of relaxing.) Every day, every moment is a new opportunity to define myself. I may not have a legacy to offer the world, but I know that I do touch lives. I have inspired. I have consoled. I have commiserated. I have laughed and brought laughter. I know that I bring a light to many. Can I call that my legacy? I don’t know. I really don’t. But I do know, that I’m not sitting around feeling sorry for myself that I don’t have a traditional legacy to offer the world. When I’m gone, the world will keep turning and I will be forgotten. That’s okay - what the heck do I care? I’ll be ashes in the wind. What’s more important to me, is being here and now and making a difference when and where I can.
My moment today is recognizing that it’s okay to be average and not have a legacy. Through that discovery process, I realized also that those closest to me would never agree with that statement above. I know that I’ve made a difference in their lives. It may not be worthy of a namesake and my name going down in history, but it means the world to me to know that I’ve made a difference in some peoples lives. However small my contribution is to this world, it matters.
Moments realizing your insignificance.
Moments realizing your importance.
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Moments D384: Waste not want not
Today was Mother’s Day. A day to celebrate Mom’s everywhere who dig deep to find patience and who share their humor and love everyday. Today, sadly, was not about my dear sweet Mother. (though we certainly find ways to give her love!)
Instead of celebrating the wonderful woman who raised me today, (a woman who is strong, kind and overly generous with her love and positive energy), she and I spent the afternoon keeping my Dad’s mind occupied from his coming open-heart surgery. We were all in good spirits as we shared stories and then eventually played some cards. There was much laughter in hushed tones in the shared hospital room. We giggled like silly school kids waiting to be shushed. Fun and laugher amoung the nerves.
And while we were unable to focus solely on Mom today, I know she was comforted that I was with her. In the emotion of the day, she didn’t really read her cards. I know, tomorrow when it is over, she will take the time to savour every word. But today, today she was focused on making sure my Dad was comfortable and focused on his tough job ahead. Selfless. She’s always been so selfless.
In my own private way I celebrated Mom from the moment I left my house to the end of the day. After all, the amount of love she has for my father is tangible and adorable to watch. (Don't we all dream of that? ) My first stop of today, which also reminded me of my incredible Mother was the inspiration of today’s moment.
As children my Mother would always remind my brother and I “waste not want not”. The premise being, don’t take more than you need, or if you do, share or repurpose it.
On my way to meet my Mom and Dad at the hospital I stopped to eat lunch at a lo
cal Mr. Sub. There was gent, maybe a wee younger than I who ordered, was served before me, and he finished eating before me. I watched him as he left.
He paused just outside the door and started to rub his fingers together. It actually took me a moment to understand what he was doing. He was actually standing there crumbling his leftover bun onto the ground below. When the realization came I smiled immediately and thought to myself “waste not want not”.
There were many other moments today that reminded me how special my mother is. So, while we weren't able to have a big focused celebration of Mom today, I know I celebrated her all day long.
Thank you Mom for teaching me what is most important in life. Of course I'm at your side helping. You taught me well.
Moments of childhood memories.
Moments being thankful for such a beautiful soul in my life.
Saturday, May 11, 2013
Moments D383: Hats
Today I was in Chinatown with my Mom & Dad for dinner (which, incidentally was delightful in both the company and the food!). On the way back to the hotel, my Mom & I stopped into a couple of shops along the way.
One of the cute stores sold hats and glasses. Now, typically I wouldn’t bother dropping into this kind of store, after all, I don’t really wear fancy hats. (Winter hats & baseball hats, sure….but a cute fedora?) But we were lazily making our way back, so we stopped in.
There we were, Mom & daughter trying on hats and eyeing the scarves. Everything was on sale. Mom & I discussed the merits of owning a hat such as this cute fedora. Where the heck would I ever wear it? That really wasn’t the question. The question was, for $10, why not find a place to wear the cute fedora? And so, I bought it, along with a killer scarf with skulls on it.
Yes, now I need a place to wear it. Think it’s too much for the hospital tomorrow?
Moments stepping outside your comfort zone.
One of the cute stores sold hats and glasses. Now, typically I wouldn’t bother dropping into this kind of store, after all, I don’t really wear fancy hats. (Winter hats & baseball hats, sure….but a cute fedora?) But we were lazily making our way back, so we stopped in.
There we were, Mom & daughter trying on hats and eyeing the scarves. Everything was on sale. Mom & I discussed the merits of owning a hat such as this cute fedora. Where the heck would I ever wear it? That really wasn’t the question. The question was, for $10, why not find a place to wear the cute fedora? And so, I bought it, along with a killer scarf with skulls on it.
Yes, now I need a place to wear it. Think it’s too much for the hospital tomorrow?
Moments stepping outside your comfort zone.
Moments finding a new fashion statement. (maybe...)
Friday, May 10, 2013
Moments D382: Contemplation Redux
Today was a bit of a strange day for me. I started this blog earlier, but wasn’t really sure, or able to find the words. Today, after a day spent sitting with the sadness and unease that fills me, I think I can explain.
I can sum it up by being a day of contemplation once again.
I suppose that’s what happens when things shift in your life and one is faced with the bigger questions in life. What’s the point? What’s my purpose. What is a need and what is a want. (Oh, my Mom would smile at that. She always asked us as kids to stop and consider if our request was a need or a want.) It’s that moment, after deep musings within, that you realize, or perhaps you are reminded, that every day is special. Every day is an opportunity to seize growth and learning and to push a little bit forward. To pause and be thankful for learning opportunities given to us, for without them we are stale, lost in the mundane day-to-day drudgery.
Yes, every day is special. How easily we forget this. And yet, how quickly we are reminded of that when a loved one faces an unnerving surgery.
That’s the moment when pieces of your past fall away and you realize that your present is everything. Every moment is special. And tomorrow, well, tomorrow is a gift. A gift of another opportunity. Another chance to do things better, more lovingly, more soulfully.
Sometimes sitting back and contemplating things is valuable to one’s perspective. Contemplating can (and did) stir up a flood of emotions. (Lost time, lost growth, missed opportunities, etc.) But what perspective it brings about what is most important.
Today - I celebrate that moment. That moment of meditative revelation of what’s most important in my life. And I turn to the universe and share that love out, in the hopes that it will be reflected back upon those I love most a million (or more…is that selfish?) times over.
Moments to dig deeper.
I can sum it up by being a day of contemplation once again.
I suppose that’s what happens when things shift in your life and one is faced with the bigger questions in life. What’s the point? What’s my purpose. What is a need and what is a want. (Oh, my Mom would smile at that. She always asked us as kids to stop and consider if our request was a need or a want.) It’s that moment, after deep musings within, that you realize, or perhaps you are reminded, that every day is special. Every day is an opportunity to seize growth and learning and to push a little bit forward. To pause and be thankful for learning opportunities given to us, for without them we are stale, lost in the mundane day-to-day drudgery.
Yes, every day is special. How easily we forget this. And yet, how quickly we are reminded of that when a loved one faces an unnerving surgery.
That’s the moment when pieces of your past fall away and you realize that your present is everything. Every moment is special. And tomorrow, well, tomorrow is a gift. A gift of another opportunity. Another chance to do things better, more lovingly, more soulfully.
Sometimes sitting back and contemplating things is valuable to one’s perspective. Contemplating can (and did) stir up a flood of emotions. (Lost time, lost growth, missed opportunities, etc.) But what perspective it brings about what is most important.
Today - I celebrate that moment. That moment of meditative revelation of what’s most important in my life. And I turn to the universe and share that love out, in the hopes that it will be reflected back upon those I love most a million (or more…is that selfish?) times over.
Moments to dig deeper.
Moments D381b: Champions & Losers
BTW - yesterday was also a double header for me and I had to share.
I played in my season’s playoffs last night from 6-8pm. We were in first place. We played hard, we played well, and we WON the championship.
And then, I went to the late game to sub in with my baseball team from last year. This team has been placed in the top tier. It shouldn't be. We lost. We lost very, very badly. But, you know, we all had a lot of fun. That’s what matters most, right?
I played in my season’s playoffs last night from 6-8pm. We were in first place. We played hard, we played well, and we WON the championship.
And then, I went to the late game to sub in with my baseball team from last year. This team has been placed in the top tier. It shouldn't be. We lost. We lost very, very badly. But, you know, we all had a lot of fun. That’s what matters most, right?
Thursday, May 9, 2013
Moments D381: Rain Shower
Ah…..spring. I really do love it. I love watching the world around me fill in with green leaves, colourful flowers, and the change in temperature. I even enjoy the crazy temperature changes (from 0 degrees in the morning to 22 degrees in the late afternoon).
Today was one of those delightful spring days. It started off with a rainy spring day. It was a warm spring rain shower. It was light shower and I had no problem enjoying it as I walked from one of our offices to the other.
As I passed the parking lot’s entry way, I glanced out to the sidewalk and street beyond. Walking past the driveway, was a gentleman with his eyes closed and his head tilted to the sky. He was walking slowly. You could tell that he was enjoying every moment of the rain hitting his face.
I smiled. And then I did the same.
Moments being inspired.
Moments enjoying the season and the spring rain shower.
Today was one of those delightful spring days. It started off with a rainy spring day. It was a warm spring rain shower. It was light shower and I had no problem enjoying it as I walked from one of our offices to the other.
As I passed the parking lot’s entry way, I glanced out to the sidewalk and street beyond. Walking past the driveway, was a gentleman with his eyes closed and his head tilted to the sky. He was walking slowly. You could tell that he was enjoying every moment of the rain hitting his face.
I smiled. And then I did the same.
Moments being inspired.
Moments enjoying the season and the spring rain shower.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)